Jenny: “put your football away, it takes a matt bottom to know a matt bottom”
A Matt bottom is someone who claims he is curious about the female anatomy when all he really wants is nudes. You know you’re talking to a matt bottom when he’s always active on Facebook, is three years behind on social media and if you went to nandos he would get one fino side of creamy mash and offer to pay on his loyalty card. A Matt bottom thinks dirty talking sounds like:
‘What length Pyjamas do you where’
‘How soft are you’re lips’
‘What do you like about me’
A Matt bottom is desperate to lose his virginty, and claims his favourite game is truth or dare when everyone knows it’s mind craft. You can physically identify a Matt bottom by seeing if he’s wearing a football top, matching shoes and spikey hair
A Matt bottom will be a 17 year old lad kicking a ball around the park and chatting up any girl in sight.
This full kit wanker is someone to keep clear of.
Luke:’ Jenny stay clear of that kid, he’s a Matt bottom’
Jenny:’put your football away Luke it takes a Matt bottom to know a Matt bottom’