Mall Squatter

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Mall Squatter
All the same qualities of a mall crawler but for overlanders. Usually a late model 4runner or Jeep JK with tons of unnecessary off road shit strapped to their vehicles, which they’ll never use. Mall Squatters are easily identified by their roof top tent, 33 inch tires, maxtrax pads and empty rotopax attached to the exterior of their vehicle. The tires will be glazed with tire shine, the paint will look just like it did the day they bought it, and the headliner will be covered with overlanding patches. Light bars and ditch lights with yellow lenses are also a dead giveaway.
Maria – “why does that guys always have a roof top tent on his minivan?”

Me- “For squatting at the mall and Instagram pictures”

Maria- “does he ever use it?”

Me- “yea, he camps in it 3 times a year but paid more for it than the mattress on his bed”

Maria- “why does he have water and gas cans strapped to his tire carrier, does he travel a lot?”

Me- “no, they’re empty”

Maria- “so he’s just a mall squatter.”
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